If you're a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (aka Mormon) then you are most likely aware of the comings and goings of the Ordain Women group and how the founder of that group was excommunicated this week.

My friends on Facebook have varied in their responses but I think all are saddened by the events surrounding this heated issue.

I have mainly stayed quiet about it all and am only choosing to post my thoughts on this blog (which no one reads!). I'm doing this because a. I don't want to ruffle feathers on Facebook and b. I think it's a sad day for everyone on both sides of the camp -- and even for those of us in between. No one wants to see a fellow Saint be given the news that they can no longer participate in our Sacrament meeting or Temple ceremonies. It's sad.

That said I have never been totally comfortable with the OW movement. I'm not sure I even understand it completely. From the time I was a young girl I was told that my prayers to Heavenly Father matter just as much as a boys. They matter just as much as other girls... same with adults. I was taught that God loves all of us. He knows each of us by name and watches out for us all. My grandmother taught me that if I was ever alone and without a priesthood holder nearby that I could still pray and my prayers would be heard.

Are there people who would disagree with that statement? Probably. But do I care? Nope. Because I know it's true. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and will answer my prayers with or without the priesthood. Can I bless someone else in Jesus' name? Well, I do every time I close a prayer in His name -- so yes. Does it have the same weight? I think that depends. I love getting priesthood blessings. I think there is power in the priesthood. Am I sad that I don't have it? Again, not really. Do I understand why men have it and women don't? Nope. But I have faith that God still sees us as separate but equal beings who loves all of us.

Are there men out there who hold their priesthood over our heads who don't have it? Of course. There are jackholes everywhere you go. But in my life I have met very few of them (men who hold their priesthood covenants over my head. Unfortunately I have met a lot of jackholes). Most of them don't think women amount to much - with or without the priesthood - so not having it doesn't change their opinion of us anyway.

Do I question the mentality that my church AND others have regarding women and the priesthood? I have, yes. I have thought about it and for awhile was semi irked about it. But I kept reading my scriptures, kept praying about it and kept listening to conference for answers.  I read a ton and that has helped me tremendously... especially because I am careful with what I read. I have read a lot of the anti-mormon literature but I don't feel peaceful when I read it. It leaves me with sadness. When I read the scriptures and even church history - I feel more at peace. So that is how I judge what I read.

I thought I'd share some talks that I have read over the years that has helped me with certain issues with regards to my religion and just religion in general. I hope that it helps that one or two people who will find this blog one day. ha!

With regards to priesthood -- I love this talk by Elder Oaks, "Two Lines of Communication." It explains it a lot more clearly to me than I understood before. Here is the link:
Two Lines of Communication

With regards to why bad things happen to good people -- I LOVE LOVE LOVE this talk by President Kimball. I remember reading this a few years ago (2007?) and thinking this is the best thing I've ever read. It answered a lot of my questions about life. Here is the link:
Teachings of President Kimball, Chpt 2

With regards to having questions and being a member -- I loved this talk that President Uchtdorf gave last October (2013). It definitely ruffled some feathers and made people think. Love it! Here is the link: Come Join With Us

So there you have it. I know that there are many who are doubting their faith right now and I hope and pray that they will find the peace and answers they are looking for. I hope this helps lead them down the right path for them. It did for me.

Hope you enjoy.
Love,
Kate

Shapes and Sizes

I've been thinking a lot about body image... there are so many shapes and sizes out there and somehow, somewhere, someone got the grand idea that we should all look the same.

And not just the same size - but similar fashion sensibility as well. It's not enough that we try to attain the same size 2 or 4 (impossible for most of us) but we shun ourselves and others when we don't. How many of us have looked at ourselves in the mirror and been disappointed with the body staring back at you. 

I admit that the first time I looked in a full length mirror after I gave birth to my second child was truly a frightening experience for me. I remember going to Banana Republic to look for something that made me feel "normal" again and looking in their full length mirror and freaking out. Who IS that woman staring back at me? I didn't recognize my own body anymore. If someone had taken a photo of myself and chopped off my head and said, "Pick out your body" out of a line up of pics -- I would not have picked my own. I just would not have guessed that the body in the mirror was mine. Craziness!

I'm not saying that it's not okay to be shocked by the changes we go through as we age. I remember my grandmother telling me that she'd look in the mirror and not recognize the old lady staring back at her. I didn't really comprehend back then what she was saying though, as I had only known her as a grandma. She was always grandma to me. I thought she was just beautiful and couldn't understand why she'd want to look any different when I loved her just the way she was. I feel that way about my friends as well. Yes, it was fun when we were young and wrinkle free. But I'm so glad that we're all still here together getting wrinkles and wishing Calgon could really take us away.
 
I sat in my car at a red light the other day and a woman crossed in front of me. She was walking towards me and she was a "bigger" woman. I mean, really big. Her breasts were about a foot away from her chin. Her belly was further out than that, her legs were large as well as her rear end. And she had a wonderful warm smile that took over her face. As she crossed in front of me I thought to myself, "She looks like a good hugger." She looked warm and inviting. And I got sad. Because most people in the world don't judge a woman that large as beautiful. But at that moment, walking across the street, with the afternoon sun hitting just right - she did. She was absolutely beautiful. I wished I could have rolled down my window and yelled to her - Hey! You look beautiful right now! - but I can only imagine what would happen if I did. LOL.
 
Does any of this make sense? I'm still trying to make sense of it all myself. There are days when I don't care how much I weigh and I like to look in the mirror when I'm dressing and say, "Suck it, Satan. I'm beautiful just the way I am." Then there are days when I think to myself, "Suck it in, girl! Argh!"

I just wish that we all recognized the beauty in ourselves and in others no matter our sizes. Size really shouldn't matter (that's what he said - sorry, couldn't help myself) but what's inside should count more. How many skinny bitchy women have I known? Probably just as many larger bitchy women... or single bitchy women or married biotches. They come in all shapes and sizes. How we treat each other should be the gold standard not if we can fit into our skinny jeans from the late 90's.

Let's be nicer to each other and to ourselves. Let's tell Satan to SUCK IT every time we look in the mirror and tell ourselves that we really are beautiful and that we really do have worth.